Boxed Macaroni and Cheese...without the bland
|
I don’t know how many times I’ve sat, most likely in just my boxers, eating macaroni and cheese, wondering how to make it taste less boring. Granted, this probably isn’t something most people worry about. Most people would just buy different food but, as you’ve probably noticed, I’m different. At least that’s what everyone tells me.
So, I set out to make boxed Velveeta Macaroni and "Cheese" not taste as dull. I tried many things, most of which ended up tasting...well, they weren’t dull anymore, but they weren’t edible either. The root of the problem is that the "Cheese" isn’t actually cheese. It seems to be some sort of soft silly putty that has been dyed yellow and flavored "cheese". Not very appetizing. My goal with this was to mask the flavor of the cheese with something else...but at the same time, have that something else not taste worse than that which it was replacing.
The solution? Jack Daniel’s Spicy Southwest Mustard. This stuff is great. It’s like mustard...only it tastes way better. And it has all kinds of spicy stuff (as you could probably guess from the name) that is good at hiding the cardboard flavor of the cheese.
Anyways, without further ado, I present to you:
...
I sat here for a few minutes trying to come up with a name. The best I could come up with was Boxed Macaroni and Cheese and Mustard, but that didn’t sound very good.
Skipping the title, we move to the list of ingredients.
| Ingredients:
- Velveeta Macaroni and "Cheese"
- Texas Pete hot sauce
- Cajun seasoning
- Dried Cilantro
- Jack Daniel’s Spicy Southwestern Mustard
|
|
First, make sure the frying pan is well oiled.
Er, no.
Start by taking a nice low-angle shot of the stove with the faint hope that you can actually catch a reflection on the camera.
Success! Of sorts!
While the water was boiling over, I took some pictures of the ingredients. First up are the ones that belong in the water:
Some may argue that the leftmost one actually belongs in the trash, instead of in the water. They may be right.
These go in the pasta, after it has been drained.
At this point, the water should be nice and boiling. I added the hot sauce (very liberally) and the cajun seasoning at this point, followed by the pasta.
I let this sit for a while, thinking about what I was doing. It felt weird. If I kept it up, I’d soon start changing it in even bigger ways. Soon, I would probably end up removing the cheese-flavored rubber wannabe sludge. I didn’t have much time to think about this though, because the pasta was done. I drained the water and put it inside a leftover container. Yes, it moved directly to a leftover container. I don’t have any proper dishes that could hold this much macaroni, and if you put it back in the pot, it chars.
Here it is, in all of its unadulterated glory:
Proof that the cheese is based on silly putty:
Add Spicy Southwest mustard and Oregano:
Mix well. Mix until you sling bits of pasta and "cheese" all over the place. Once that is done, serve with some gin. It helps you forget that the ingredients that you added cost far more than the pasta itself. I cry myself to sleep at night thinking about this.
It’s not actually that bad. In fact, it’s quite good. I would know because I just ate it. I can’t write on an empty stomach, you know. |
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Posted at 2:37pm on Wed, Sep 17 2008 by dead_drederS:
Priveet!! Medveed!!! |
Posted at 11:06pm on Thu, Sep 18 2008 by StypeNeew:
Georgia Offers Fresh Evidence on War’s Start
A new front has opened between Georgia and Russia, now over which side was the aggressor whose military activities early last month ignited the lopsided five-day war. At issue is new intelligence, inconclusive on its own, that nonetheless paints a more complicated picture of the critical last hours before war broke out.
Georgia has released intercepted telephone calls purporting to show that part of a Russian armored regiment crossed into the separatist enclave of South Ossetia nearly a full day before Georgia’s attack on the capital, Tskhinvali, late on Aug. 7. |
Posted at 7:49am on Fri, Sep 19 2008 by BiolutleBef:
Boy gets bonked from both sides. |
Posted at 7:19pm on Fri, Sep 19 2008 by BiolutleBef:
Twink takes monster dildos and big meat. |
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Posted at 10:10pm on Sat, Sep 20 2008 by InesiaTelenaw:
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Posted at 7:03am on Sun, Sep 21 2008 by creeptpaync:
I am getting more and more worried about the economy and global meltdown.
The more things change the more they remain the same. The fundamental challenges we face today have changed little since Chaucer penned his observations on life and distilled them in a set of tales. In the modern city of Canterbury University Students analyse and dissect the meanings conveyed in texts set in that very locale in the 1300’s.
Youngsters face today’s Jekyll and Hyde society not knowing that the Constants remain; love, betrayal, desire, fear. Each story conveys a lesson as we study for our degree in the University of Life, the big diploma mill of which we are all Alumni. We sit grinning like Cheshire cats, thinking we have all the answers.
We call it a success when we pollute our atmosphere shooting down our own Satellite USA 193, Market Street Credibility is our preferred accreditation and recognition from our peers and fellow consumers, we Poison our Planet for Profit. Banks have crashed before and remember – you can’t eat money.
Globalization has consequences. Everything we do has consequences, even something simple like buying firewood. The Oregon ODA advises not to obtain anything from out-of-state because of all the insects and diseases it might carry. That is just a relatively local issue. Imagine all the things that are carried around the world each day – each hour. We must protect our future, just as we should remember our past. All over the world, From the UK to the USA and the Seychelles to Egypt, still, yes, STILL, there is no REAL alternative to fossil fuels.
Are we all going to purgatory in a wheelbarrow telling each other stories to pass the time? Sometimes I wonder!
Sorry guys, I had a long day and feel sick of the world. Rant Over! |
Posted at 8:05pm on Sun, Sep 21 2008 by creeptpaync:
I am getting more and more worried about the economy and global meltdown.
The more things change the more they remain the same. The fundamental challenges we face today have changed little since Chaucer penned his observations on life and distilled them in a set of tales. In the modern city of Canterbury University Students analyse and dissect the meanings conveyed in texts set in that very locale in the 1300’s.
Youngsters face today’s Jekyll and Hyde society not knowing that the Constants remain; love, betrayal, desire, fear. Each story conveys a lesson as we study for our degree in the University of Life, the big diploma mill of which we are all Alumni. We sit grinning like Cheshire cats, thinking we have all the answers.
We call it a success when we pollute our atmosphere shooting down our own Satellite USA 193, Market Street Credibility is our preferred accreditation and recognition from our peers and fellow consumers, we Poison our Planet for Profit. Banks have crashed before and remember – you can’t eat money.
Globalization has consequences. Everything we do has consequences, even something simple like buying firewood. The Oregon ODA advises not to obtain anything from out-of-state because of all the insects and diseases it might carry. That is just a relatively local issue. Imagine all the things that are carried around the world each day – each hour. We must protect our future, just as we should remember our past. All over the world, From the UK to the USA and the Seychelles to Egypt, still, yes, STILL, there is no REAL alternative to fossil fuels.
Are we all going to purgatory in a wheelbarrow telling each other stories to pass the time? Sometimes I wonder!
Sorry guys, I had a long day and feel sick of the world. Rant Over! |
Posted at 6:23am on Tue, Sep 23 2008 by LittleJinaJounes:
Have you ever wanted to multiply your videocam into several video applications? Usual Windows abilities do not allow multiplying of one video camera into several applications. It’s a wrong. Now I need to split video stream from my cam into several video programs to talk with my sisters through www. Does anybody know some program to do this? |
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Posted at 9:05pm on Fri, Sep 26 2008 by glolveply:
Девочки трепещут от прикосновений горячих языков лесби-подруг к своим непорочным кискам. |
Posted at 3:09am on Sat, Sep 27 2008 by glolveply:
Только здесь вы найдете огромную видео коллекцию жесткого горячего секса с юными ненасытными девчонками |
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Posted at 8:11pm on Mon, Oct 6 2008 by winrembo:
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и другое ЛИЦЕНЗИОННОЕ ПО Microsoft
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Posted at 7:27am on Mon, Oct 13 2008 by dooloLetWealt:
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Posted at 4:23pm on Mon, Oct 13 2008 by softishka:
Куплю Windows Куплю Windows -Vista/XP/2003 softishka@mail.ru
и другой ЛИЦЕНЗИОННЫЙ софт
пишите на е-мейл softishka@mail.ru |
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